As my children keep insisting on having birthdays, I have noticed a few things about my feelings as a mother. It's been so wonderful to see them stretch and grow and pull away a little more from under my wings, and I love having these adult children to visit with and discuss things such as movies and great books we're reading or a passage of Scripture that someone found intriguing. At the same time, though, my heart aches as I write this because I just never knew that this role GOD gave me was going to fill me so much only to take away those moments little by little as these precious gifts grow up and out.
It's all a season, I know, but it seems like it's been a shorter season than I originally thought. I read a friend's blog recently, and as she commented on the daily things she encounters, I was taken back to those same moments - endless piles of diapers, baskets full of baby clothes to be folded and put away, toys scattered here and there, and then the occasional Lego or doll shoe left to trap me in my nightly rendezvous with the nursing baby. How I thought those days would last forever, and here I am wishing I could just enjoy them one more time.
Then, I find myself turning to the season I'm in and finding that it was so much better than I dreamed it would be. Who knew how much pleasure I'd find in hearing my adult children talking about their dreams and plans for the future. Who knew how much my heart would ache as they share their disappointments and struggles. Then, once again, relishing in the moment as we laugh and cry and grumble over this character and that plot in whatever book or movie we happen to be enjoying together.
I wish there was a verse that said, "And the Momma while rise up and call her children blessed because they have brought much joy into her life", but how can you really put into words what I feel right now.....you can't, and that's why HE chose not to, either. HE is wise enough to know that you need to just wrap your arms around these feelings and treasure them forever!!
When GOD called Peter and John to go out and take on the mission HE gave them, I don't think they realized what joy they would experience as they followed the path HE laid out for them. By the same token, I just had no idea the joy I would store up as I answered the call to take on the mission of raising these four arrows HE placed in my care for this short season. I praise GOD for HIS calling and have never regretted all the earthly things I gave up in order to step UP to this role, and I rejoice each time I read a blog post or hear a young Momma share that she, too, is loving her mission that HE has given her.
Meet Me in Montenegro (2015)
10 years ago
4 comments:
I like this post. :)
I feel so blessed to have such a large age spread between our children because I can acutely feel the years speeding by.
Having a 15 1/2 year old is surreal because it really does seem like yesterday I was changing her diaper. My little guy is almost one year old already! How the heck did that happen?
I love these years when they are little and it will really weigh heavily on my heart when they are over. I know that the next chapters will be wonderful in their own way, but the baby and toddler years are so special and such an intense bonding time.
One thing that having much older children has done is give me perspective when it comes to difficult developmental issues like not sleeping long stretches, cranky episodes, etc. because it can seem like forever when you are going through it but I know from experience that it is actually such a short period.
Beautiful and poignant post, Cathy!
Lisa,
I can't believe she's that old either. We used to be that old, remember?? I'm just so very grateful that we've had the blessing of enjoying so much time with our children. I just finished reading a book called The Ishbane Conspiracy by Randy Alcorn (excellent read), and it was just a great reminder of what an influence we've been able to be for the next generation.
I do miss the baby/toddler season, but I am thankful that each season brings a joy of its own. I also look forward to the next season of Grandma time - wonderful baby time without the lack of sleep!!!
I am really enjoying the season I am in with my little guy. It is going by so quickly I that I want to find a pause button for a few more days!!
I tagged you in a post!
http://carolynscozycorner.blogspot.com/2012/03/playing-game.html
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