That's OK......or is it??

I was watching a young Momma with her little one (about 3 years). The child did something wrong, Mom corrected him, and when the child said "I'm sorry", Momma said, "That's OK." What?? Why was it not OK before, but now it's OK??

I do know that the Mom was trying to tell the child "All is forgiven, and we'll not bring it up anymore." My question is.....why don't we say, "All is forgiven, and we'll not bring it up anymore."???

When I was a young Momma, I did the same thing. When my little ones wronged someone (usually their other sibling), I tackled that situation with an iron fist. 1) Here's what you did wrong. 2) Now you need to apologize 3) Remind the offended individual know they are supposed to say "That's OK" 4) Pat myself on the back for another job well done in the parenting arena!! I know it was a sight to behold watching me in action....

Thankfully, GOD sent someone to straighten me out.

First, while it is good to point out what my little ones did wrong, my reason for doing so was to remind them they served a Holy GOD who had standards. If the incident was against HIS standard, I wanted them to know that, so I started "discipling" them (imagine that concept). If it was an incident that went against our family standards, then I wanted them to know that as well. I didn't want them to become adults thinking that something was sin because our family said so. I wanted them to know that sin was sin because GOD said so, but at the same time, I also wanted them to understand that some things we do because that's what we like - not because GOD said so. (You know, no burping at the table unless it's BBB night)

Second, I did not want them to apologize. Webster says this about apology:

"An excuse: something said or written in defense or extenuation of what
appears to others wrong, or unjustifiable;"

Ummm, maybe I'm wrong, but I just don't think there are too many cases where you can make an excuse for hitting your sister because she took your toy away. Seriously, though, I do know I'm splitting hairs here, but it did get me thinking about what I was doing. Was I really teaching them GOD's way or man's way when I told them to apologize for something they did wrong? Did I want them to learn to justify their bad choices, or did I want them to understand what THEY did wrong and how to make amends. For me, it was as simple as teaching them to ask for forgiveness.

The Psalmist teaches us in Psalm 79:9, "Help us, O GOD of our salvation, for the glory of Thy name; and deliver us, and forgive our sins, for Thy name's sake."

He doesn't apologize and try to justify to a Holy GOD why they did what they did. No, he asks for GOD's forgiveness. I realized that's what I needed to do and what I wanted my children to do as well.

Third, I had to ask myself why I wanted the offender to apologize for something when I've taught the offended to say, "That's OK." NO!! If it was OK to begin with, then why in the world did Momma just say to not do that?? OK. So, I'm a redneck at heart and a little slow....but I eventually catch on.....

If the offense was wrong by GOD's standard....and the offender needed to seek forgiveness.....then it only stands to reason that the offended needs to forgive. I get it!! I didn't want them to learn to just walk away from the situation, but I wanted them to know that when we wrong someone, they can actually still love us, forgive us, and desire to be in a relationship with us. I wanted them to learn that lesson with each other because that's what their faith would be built on. I knew that my dear children would offend GOD during their lives, but that HE will always be standing there with open arms waiting to forgive them, to love them, and to be in a relationship with them - no matter what. Jeremiah 9:17, "...But THOU art a GOD of forgiveness, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and abounding in loving-kindness; and THOU didst not forsake them."

Is it splitting hairs? I don't think so. I think there is a huge difference in apologizing and asking forgiveness. There are even times when you need to do both. "Honey, I'm sorry I was late. There was an accident on the freeway and traffic was stopped. Please forgive me for not being here when I said I would." Will that make a difference? You bet. How much nicer it is to have someone acknowledge that they've offended you. Then, how much nicer for the offender to hear, "I forgive you" instead of "That's OK" The offender knows it's not OK. So do you. If that's what we know as grownups, then why don't we start that lesson when they're little??

Take this to the next level.....how do we feel when we know we've offended GOD? Do we really feel better when we pour our heart out and 'apologize' to GOD and let HIM know WHY we did something - as if an omniscient GOD didn't already know. Or do we feel a relief and overwhelming outpouring of love when we repent and seek forgiveness knowing that GOD already promised to forgive us in 1 John 1:9. If that's how we feel, then let's help our children learn that feeling, too, because it's NOT OK......

Hunting/Sewing

Ahh!  The Weekend our family has looked forward to for a long while!  The boys as they are going hunting in Tucumcari at Dad's parents ranch, while the girls are staying at home sewing, watching movies, and just plain ole enjoying each other! 

Thankfully everyone is feeling well and no one else has felt icky.  So, have a wonderful weekend- I am off to finish watching Bleak House!  (It is a story by Charles Dickens that Mom and I both read, so now we are watching the movie) 

~Rebecca

They're home!!

Hello friends!

My wonderful family is home!! HURRAY!  They arrived LATE last night, I think some time around midnight or 1 am.  I had gone to bed already.  It was so wonderful to wake up this morning, roll over and see all 3 of my sweet siblings in their beds.  Ah, nothing better. 

Although I enjoyed my time alone, I did miss everyone!! Life is just so much more fun with siblings around to tease and play with you.  :-)

So, what did I do while they were gone?

Well, I had some very odd meals.. never ate at the 'right' time (no one else to feed but yourself, well you just forget!).  Often times I would look at the clock, see it was 3:00 pm and think, "I guess I should eat something"!! 

Addie Suggested I should sew something fun.  Maggie Suggested I should sit down and read.  Well, I have to say that I am not a big fan of reading, though I do enjoy it every once in a while. So, I sewed something cute and fun.  I can't wait to post pictures!  Hopefully you will see it this week in the fashion show entries. :-)

Daddy and I enjoyed some wonderful time together.  We visited tons and just really had a blast.  I was very thankful to have him all to myself for a couple of evenings.

Last night I went to Charity Quilting at our local quilt shop.  We made "quilt as you go" place mats for "Meals on Wheels".  It was lots of fun.  The quilting as you go was the BEST thing I have ever learned.  Unless it is hand quilting, I totally fail at quilting period. ;-) lol

My wonderful friends came a picked me up (THANK YOU!!) and we had a blast.  Laughing, teasing, sewing.  What else could a girl want?  They then took me home and I was able to spend more time with Daddy.

I still got a little bit of quiet time to myself this morning, as everyone is sleeping in.  I can't blame 'em!! In Fact, I slept in a little, too, but not that much over my regular time. ;-)

So, I am very happy that my family is home, home, HOME!!!

Hope everyone is having a blessed Wednesday!

In Christ Alone,
Sarah